8-3-10

turn off the lights.
turn the music on.
sit still.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
this isn't working
turn music up louder.
pull knees closer.
close eyes.
fight back tears.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
bite lip.
tears seep through closed eyes.
reach to turn the music louder.
louder.
louder.
louder.
louder.
louder.
louder.
louder.
louder.
louder.
louder.
louder.
louder.
tears stop.
louder.
louder.
louder.
louder.
louder. 
louder.
louder.
louder.
louder.
heart rate returns to normal.
breathing slows.
eyes open.
breathe.
in.
out.
in.
out.
in.
out.
in.
out.
in.
out.
in.
out.
in.
out.
close eyes.
sniffle.
wipe nose.
open fist.
drop glass.
this isn't working
still.
silent.
complete.
completely useless.
lay there.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
wait.
breathe.
in.
out.
in.
out.
in.
out....